If my house was clean I'd kill myself

I think I know why you find these houses filled to the rafters with junk piled everywhere. It keeps people alive!

99% of the time I'm happy as can be, but on those very dark days when I think this just isn't worth it, I look around at my little house, piles of crap everywhere and think, "I can't die like this; I never cleaned that bedroom." And on those nights when I have heavy chest pains and I think "Oh, man, I'm just not going to get up, who the hell cares anyway?" I say to myself, omg, this place is such a mess, no one wants to see this, so I get up, go to the cabinet, put that aspirin under my tongue and live to see another day.

It's great having a system that works; I like it.

Thank you, my personal Help Desk

I'm sure you feel this way when you talk computers with me:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pQHX-SjgQvQ&feature=related
Bonus: it's in Norwegian!

Because I feel like it

Images are from www.engrish.com

and I didn't even pick the best ones.

Thanks, John Denver!

Yesterday morning I saw a bald eagle along the Swatara Creek. The photos are not the eagle I saw, but I searched the web until I found two photos that duplicated my eagle experience and here they are.













I was a teenager when John Denver sang: "I know he'd be a poorer man if he never saw an eagle fly," and I always thought he was right.

He WAS right.

Hershey's, the Great American Cocaine Bar

I got very happy today when someone I work with, whose husband works for Hershey, told me about this:

http://blogs.menupages.com/philadelphia/2007/11/crack_cocaine_mints_might_just.html

It amused me so much I sent the link to our Director of Marketing, who then forwarded it to his newest hire, and then told me what I hadn't known: that we just hired the new guy from Hershey where - oh frabjous day! - he worked on this very project.

So of course I run over to his office laughing maniacally and he says, no, see, crack comes in ORANGE bags....

Yes, it was a happy day.

And btw, Hershey IceBreakers also come in orange.


Oops, my bad. Cocaine. It's this one:


No, wait, that's heroin. THIS one:

People (including me) like to complain that our young 'uns spend too much time on meaningless computer activity, and wax poetic about what people do without computers and television. Stuff like this:



Not to say this isn't bitchin', but I'll take BioShock, thank you very much.

Although I really like the hat.

I am Stan

You know, I learned something today.

If you're a white person, don't ever give anything like this:

to African-American employees. As it's pulled out of the gift bag, before one can properly see what it is, the tension in the room rises appreciably.